This is a picture of my little family...my little family that hasn't always felt like a family.
Many of you know that Stephen is in the Army whether either of us like it or not. I dated/married him knowing what I was putting myself up against...but at the same time not really. When I said "I Do"
I knew Stephen would be gone in a month, absent for the first year of our marriage, and better yet..absent for
the first 7 months of Malachi's life. No matter how much I told myself "you can do this" I was not
prepared. I don't think you can ever truly prepare yourself for a long leap of absence from the love of your life. If anything...I showed my sister in law what kind of wife NOT to be while your husband is overseas.
I've never been your typical extremely supportive military wife, and to be honest that's because I'm just not.
There are some women who manage to give a crap about the FRG, yellow ribbon events,
hanging out with the other military wives having bonding time, dining outs, and any kind of other event the
Alpha Company would host. To some, that makes me a bad wife but I have never wanted to be more involved with the military than what I already had to be just by being married to a soldier.
There's me, and then there are women who are strong as nails and know how to make the best out of their
husband's commitment. Some men actually enjoy their time serving and that is GREAT if
you still find joy in this..I'm truly happy for you because it's not easy.
But Stephen and I are both on the same page when I say
that his 6 year contract has been hell and these next 6 months could not go by quicker.
I've been dreading February because his last 2 week annual training takes place that month and to top it off
he'll be out of country. I'm trying to be happy for him that he get's to be in a beautiful country but
both of us know how stupid it's going to be and they probably won't even get time to have fun.
I keep telling myself that yes it's two weeks BUT it's the last A/T EVER so just smile and breathe.
It just feels GREAT knowing our last hurdle to get over is only a month away! I'm excited for
new possibilities once his contract comes to an end. Some civilians will never understand (until
they're faced with the same situation) what it's like to have the government own your spouse.
Having a few hundred dollars less each month might suck a little at first but it'll be worth it.
Our life as a family feels like it's just starting..we are finally getting that fresh start we needed.
So cheers to 2012 and new beginnings/adventures!
p.s. this post is not meant to be disrespectful, just transparent and real about the hell hole our lives have been...mainly Stephen's.